First Love, Last Love
by KristosLilly
Summary: A Sonny and Connie story. Mostly fluff... How things could have been if she wasn't you know, brutally murdered.
1. Chapter 1

**First Love, Last Love**

 ** _A SoCo fan fiction written for a challenge. Mostly shameless fluff. I miss these two so much. I have liked Sonny with a number of women but Connie (Kate) and Sonny just had something special IMO. I miss them. Anyway, enjoy this!_**

* * *

 **Chapter 1**

 _ **Make a "Why I Love You" List**_

A blood-red envelope was clenched in her fist as she hurried up the front steps of the Greystone. She needed to do this before she lost her nerve. It was probably stupid. It was very probably insane too, but Sonny deserved to know how she felt; even if she hated wearing her heart on her sleeve more than anything; even if she couldn't tell him these things to his face.

She _had_ to do this.

Max came out onto the porch just as she was about to stuff the envelope under the door. "Here to see Mr. C?" He asked.

"I have something for him but I am sure he's busy so I'll just leave it here and scram. Bye -" Connie broke off as Max suddenly ushered her into the house.

"The boss will want to see you," Max insisted.

Connie tugged free of his grasp and held out the envelope. "Just give this to Sonny, okay? Can you do that?" _Without it messing up?_ she added silently, biting down on her tongue so she wouldn't actually say what she was really thinking. She had a big mouth; she knew that. These flapping gums of hers all too often got her into trouble.

Max looked at the envelope in her outstretched hand. "You should give whatever that is to him yourself."

Connie gritted her teeth. "Max, I really don't have the time. I have a lot to do today and -"

 _"_ _Connie?"_ Sonny's voice met her ears and she cringed as she turned to see him standing in the doorway of his study looking damned handsome - much more than anyone had a right to.

"Oh hey, Sonny," Connie said. "I was actually just leaving." She started to hurry out the door but he moved after her, gently taking her by the arm and drawing her back.

"So soon? No, you came here for some reason. Why don't you tell me what that reason is?" He said, staring deeply into her eyes.

Her face flushed. "I was just passing through the neighborhood," Connie lied, rather unconvincingly too, she admitted to herself.

Max pointed to the envelope in her hand. "She brought you some kind of letter, Boss," he said and Connie had to resist the urge to hit Max.

"A letter, huh?" Sonny said. He tugged it free of her grip before she could stop him. She tried to grab for it but he held it up out of her reach, twisting in the opposite direction as she made another desperate grab for it.

"Let me read it," Sonny said.

"No, Sonny, no," Connie said. "It's not really very important anyway."

"Oh I think it is," Sonny said. He shredded the envelope and pulled out the white sheet of paper.

She rolled her eyes. "You don't listen very well," Connie said.

Sonny said nothing as he looked at the words scrawled in her handwriting on the page. He looked at Max. "You're excused, Max," he said and then turned to her. "And you're coming with me, Connie."

He reached for her again, taking her by the shoulders and steering her into the study. He shut the door with his foot and came to stand behind her, holding the paper out in front of them so they could both see it. Connie wanted to kick him very badly as he started reading aloud.

"'Why I love you'," Sonny said. "'A list of reasons.'"

 _Reason #1: You never gave up on me even when I gave you every reason to do so._

 _Reason #2: You have the sexiest dimples and eyes I've ever seen on any man._

Sonny paused to gently caress the nape of her neck. She shivered. "You think I am sexy, do you?" He said.

"Oh be quiet," Connie said and wanted to sink through the floor as he continued reading aloud.

 _Reason #3: You treat like I'm your equal. You know, I really appreciate that._

 _Reason #4: You make me believe I can be happy; that I deserve to be._

 _Reason #5: You don't treat me like I'm fragile or broken or crazy. I think you just love me the way I am._

 _Reason #6: You somehow got me through Trey's death. You made me realize I could love him, even if I lost him._

 _Reason #7: Most of all, I love you because you're you, Sonny. There will never be anyone else for me - ever._

Sonny finished reading the list but just kept staring at it as if he couldn't quite believe the words. Connie spun away from him. "Well, that's it then," Connie said. "See ya around."

"Connie, wait," Sonny said. He held up the paper. "Why didn't you want to give me this yourself?"

Connie sighed as she fisted her hands at her sides. "Because it's humiliating okay - needing someone the way I need you."

"Why is that humiliating?" Sonny asked. He set down the stupid list and moved over to her. She tried to look away but he reached out and cupped her face in his big hands, drawing her chin up so they were eye-to-eye.

"It just is," Connie said. "I don't _do_ needy and pathetic."

"It's not pathetic to love someone, Connie. In fact, it can be the best feeling in the world sometimes." Sonny looked at her earnestly. "Isn't it time you stop running, sweetheart? Isn't it time you came back to me?"

"Sonny, I don't like being vulnerable and that's how I am feeling right now."

"It's okay to _feel_ sometimes, Connie. It really is."

"But I feel too much…" She felt shameful, awful tears filling her eyes. "Dammit, look at what you're doing to me! This was such a colossally dumb idea."

"No, it wasn't. It was sweet."

"Did Sonny Corinthos just use the word 'sweet'? And to describe me of all people? No, Sonny, I'm not sweet. I am bitchy and complicated and messy on a good day and you'd be wise to just run screaming in the opposite direction."

"I am not going anywhere," Sonny said. He caressed her cheek, which to her horror was damp with her tears. "I don't think you want me to go anywhere either."

"Sonny," she murmured. "Do you really want to take me on?"

"You'd better believe I do," Sonny said. "I want everything with you. I think I always have. I think that the other women in my life were just a passing distraction."

"Can you really love Connie though, Sonny? You loved Kate and I can't be her anymore. I don't want to be."

"Hey, hey, remember that I loved Connie first. I will love her last, and forever."

Connie sighed and gave him a light shove. "You're saying all the right things. Damn you."

Sonny smiled, showing off those fabulous, make-your-panties-wet dimples. "I am doing my best."

"I know you are. You really are good to me, you know."

"I am not a perfect man, Connie, but the one thing you will never have to doubt again is that I love you."

"I know that now," Connie said. "That's another reason... Another reason I - I love you."

Sonny grinned. "Should we add that to the official list?"

"Shut up! I know it was a dumb idea to write that out but I just couldn't imagine saying all of those things to you out loud."

"Well, I am glad I finally know what you really feel for me. Don't be scared, okay? Don't be spooked. Don't run anymore. This time, know that I am going to take damn good care of you. I know you're strong, but it's okay to lean on me once in awhile. I want you to do that, sweetheart. I want you to feel you can trust me."

"I think I want that too," Connie said. Another tear slipped down her cheek. "You make me into an even bigger mess, you know. But ... Thank you… for not giving up on me, Sonny. It means a lot."

"I can't give up on you. I can't cut my heart out like that and you are my heart."

Connie leaned forward, her mouth mere centimeters from his luscious lips. "Why do you have to go and say stuff like that? Are you trying to turn me into a big pile of mush?"

"Depends. Is it working?"

Connie nodded. "Yeah, it's working." She pressed her lips to his. He tasted so good, he felt so good, he felt like coming home. He felt like _peace._

It was the best kiss she'd ever enjoyed and she hated for it to end. Her arms snaked up to knot around his shoulders as their mouths moved against each other's. His tongue slipped past her lips and somehow, obliterated all of her defenses in the process.

Sonny reached for the buttons on her dress and then pulled back to look at her. "I want to make love to you, Connie. Tell me you want that." His voice was low and husky.

Connie hadn't made love to Sonny since her personalities severed and she realized what had truly broken her in the first place. This felt like a new experience somehow. But she wanted it. She wanted _him._ So bad she could taste it.

She grabbed for the lapels of his suit jacket. "I want that too, Sonny. I want you to make love to me. I don't want you to let go."

He kissed her again and again. "Then don't let go, Connie. I won't either. I lost you before but never, ever again."

He scooped her up into his arms and she looped her legs around his waist. "Sonny," she whimpered as he slipped his hand between them and stroked her sensitive nipples.

"Let's get you to the bedroom."

"Screw the bedroom," Connie said. "The couch! Take me on the couch or the desk or against the wall. Just do it now, Sonny," she gasped out desperately. His hands were driving her wild.

He smiled and gently tucked an errant lock of white-blonde hair behind her ear. "You deserve better than a quick fuck, Connie. No, we're going upstairs and I am going to make love to you _all_ night long."

"Promises, promises," she whispered hoarsely.

He kissed the corners of her mouth and then juggling her in his arms, opened the study door, moving for the staircase. Max saw them and a big, goofy grin appeared on his face. Connie snapped at him, "What are you staring at? Go guard something."

Max shrugged and shuffled off. Connie clung to Sonny's taut body as they moved up the stairs, kissing passionately all of the way to his bedroom.

 _ **TO BE CONTINUED.**_


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

 ** _Send a Sweet Text_**

Sonny carried Connie down the hall to his bedroom. Her legs were still wrapped securely around his waist and he felt the heat of her body searing him through his suit pants. He was already rock hard and aching with need, but he was determined to take this slow; to make it last as long as it could. It was a long time coming.

He pushed back the door with the toe of his Italian-leather loafer and moved into the room. Connie had her arms wrapped around his shoulders and was now actively nibbling on his collarbone. His hands cupped her ass and he squeezed each taut globe in his large hands.

He kicked the door shut and spun around so that her back was pressed firmly against the wooden frame. She lifted her head to look at him with those gorgeous eyes of hers. They just stared at each other for a long moment. He couldn't quite believe that she was here again.

"Sonny," she whispered hoarsely. "I need you to make love to me right now." She rubbed herself against the front of his pants. "I want you."

"I want you too, baby, but this … We're going to make it last." He kissed her, running his tongue along her plump bottom lip, seeking entrance to her mouth. Their mouths fused together and he entangled his tongue with hers. He rested his hands on her trim hips and drew her as close to him as he could possibly get her.

Connie looked up at him as they broke apart and she let her feet connect with the floor. "I need you inside of me now," she said. "I'm coming undone here, Sonny."

"Me too," Sonny said. "But I want to make love to you. That's what I promised you so we're going to take it slow."

"Fine," she said. "Just tell me what comes next."

"No, let me _show_ you."

He pressed his hands lightly to her shoulders and spun her around, hugging her back to his chest. He lifted her soft, fine locks of hair off of her neck with one hand and rubbed her right breast with the other. He expertly worked his fingers into her blouse and ran a thumb over her puckered nipple. She shuddered in his arms. "Oh, Sonny," she cried out, her whole body trembling against his.

He continued to make love to her neck as he moved his hand to her other breast, keeping up his ministrations. Her nipples were taut and pert under his palm. He loved touching her. He wanted to touch her _all over._

"Sonny, please," she whimpered as he pinched her nipple, rolling it between his thumb and forefinger until it pebbled under his touch. "Sonnnny…"

He groaned as she jutted her hips back, rubbing her taut ass against the crotch of his pants. "You're not playing fair," he said hoarsely.

"Neither are you," she returned. "No more games. I need to be fucked."

"Patience, baby," he said. The truth was that he desperately wanted to be inside of her - he didn't know how much longer he could hold on either - but even more than that, he wanted to first touch and tease and kiss every inch of her. He wanted to make her feel all of the love that he had inside of him for her.

He took her hands, threading their fingers and led her over to the huge king size bed. "Finally," she said with a smirk. He pushed her gently onto the mattress and climbed onto the bed beside her.

His hands came to rest on her legs and he inched them up her knee-length skirt. Her body immediately arched up in response. He rubbed soft, slow circles on her skin. He slipped a finger inside the waistband of her panties and ran his digits over the soft curls there.

"Sonny, please. Come on - do it _now,"_ she said impatiently. "Please just make love to me. You're drivin' me crazy."

"Shh, you're going to enjoy this," he promised. He reached for the zipper at her hip and slowly drew it down. She held her breath as he peeled the little number down her beautiful legs. She laid there now in just a blouse and tiny red panties. He sucked in a greedy breath of his own as he looked her over.

He leaned over to kiss her inner thigh and then moved his mouth to the apex of her legs. He kissed her womanhood through her panties. The material was decidedly damp already and he could smell the sexy scent of her arousal. It drove him crazy, but again, he was determined to take his time. No wham-bam-thank-you-mam. Not tonight. Not with Connie of all people.

She mewled as he sucked on her through the fabric of her flimsy underwear. Her sharp acrylic nails sunk into his shoulder blades and she rocked against his face.

He hooked two fingers into her panties and dragged them down. She was bare now from the waist down and what a sight it was. "Fucking gorgeous," he murmured, meeting her eyes for a moment. She would have been horrified to realize that she was blushing furiously at his compliment.

He nestled a finger in her curls again, touching the fine blonde ringlets, and then moved to part her pussy lips. He sluiced a digit into her tight heat and she cried out, instantly clamping down around him. "Oh, Sonny," she whimpered as he moved his finger to stroke that sensitive bundle of nerves. He moved another finger inside of her and gently pinched the sensitive nub. She quaked on the bed, her legs squeezing together and holding him in a silken vice.

He drew one of her luscious, lean legs over his right shoulder and began to lick at her seam. He pushed his tongue into her and kissed her clit before beginning to nibble on it. She arched up on the bed and he saw her hands move to her pert breasts. She kneaded them as he made love to her pussy with his greedy tongue. He loved that she was touching herself. It was such a turn on.

He felt her begin to tremble in his embrace, her whole body giving over to the power of her orgasm. She shrieked out his name and several curse words tumbled from her lips as she tipped over the edge, coating his tongue with her sweet, sensual juices. He greedily lapped at her, pinning her in place with two hands as he licked her. He felt her cum again in just another minute and he looked up at her. She had a wide smile on her pretty face.

"Sonny, that was … Fucking fantastic," she said. She smirked. "And you're way too dressed, you know. It's not exactly fair."

Sonny just laughed. He moved to a sitting position and started to undress but she was quickly shoving his hands away.

"Let me," she said. She peeled off his suit jacket and hurriedly clawed at the buttons on his shirt. She flung the two items to the floor as she leaned in to kiss either of his nipples. He growled and fisted his hands in her hair. She licked and nibbled on him as she led her hands down his taut abs to graze the soft tuft of hair that trailed into his pants.

She reached for his belt buckle and pried it open. She tugged the leather through the loops and tossed it to the floor among the other clothing. Finally, he lifted up as she tugged down his trousers, taking his boxer briefs and shoes with them. All of his clothes were now a heap on the floor. She pressed her hand to his rockhard cock and gave him several smooth, swift pumps. He shouted _"_ _Connie!"_ as she kept up her work. Precum glistened at the tip of his member.

He didn't know how much longer he could hold on now.

 _So much for taking it slow._

He kissed her on the mouth as his hands went to her blouse. He peeled back the material and unclasped her bra as their lips pressed together. He threw her blouse and bra aside and laid his hands over her breasts, giving them each a firm squeeze. He trailed his mouth down to her chin and kissed her throat as he tugged her atop of him. She sandwiched to his body as he kissed either of her shoulders.

"Sonny, now, _now!"_ She cried out.

He could not deny her any longer. He shifted his hips and taking his cock in hand, he brought it to her slick opening. He pushed into her and paused for a moment to allow her to readjust to his sheer size. When she started gyrating her hips against his, he knew that she was ready.

He pumped his hips as she rode him, nails sinking into the flesh of his chest. He reached between them to fondle her breasts before sliding his hands lower and lower still. He found her clit and eased a finger inside of her as they made love.

She matched him thrust for thrust, screaming at the top of her lungs as he hit a particularly sensitive spot on her body. She clung to him and their movements began to speed up in rhythm. He could see in her pretty eyes that she was ready.  
 _  
"Sonny!"_ She cried out as she came. He came just after her and they sailed to the heights of pleasure together before crashing back down to earth. Her body melded against his and they lay there for a long moment, not saying a word.

When she finally did speak, her voice was thick with emotion and her Bensonhurst accent shone through. "That was pretty fuckin' incredible, ya know?" She said.

He pressed two fingers gently to her chin, drawing her gaze up to meet his. Her eyes were glassy with a sheen of tears. She tried to look away but he shook his head. "Don't look away. Don't be ashamed."

"I'm not," Connie said. "I'm … I'm humbled. I'm awed. Sonny, I'm in love."

"With me, I hope," he teased.

She nodded. "Of course, you. There's never gonna be no one else."

"I love you, Connie."

"I love it when you call me that."

"Well, that's your name right?"

She nodded. "Yeah, yeah it is,"she said. She snuggled to his body and he held her tightly.

Sonny felt Connie sag in his embrace. Her legs were nestled between his and her head came to rest in the crook of his neck. He knew that she was instantly asleep. Her breathing was soft and even and he realized that he relished the sound.

He stroked her soft blonde hair as she lay atop him, enjoying the feeling of her lithe, naked body in his arms. He had her back. He had his woman back. His beloved Connie. Not Kate. He had loved Kate, but he was madly _in love_ with Connie.

He smiled at the thought, dimples appearing in either of his cheeks, as he gently shifted his arm so that he could reach across her without waking her. He grabbed for his cell phone on the bedside table. He thought about how brave she had been to write that note about the things she loved about him. She had really put herself out there, made herself vulnerable - something she no doubt hated - and he wasn't about to forget it. He would find some way to return the sentiment but for now, he had this moment.

He cradled her as best as he could in his arms as he started to type out a short little text message to her, one that she would find in the morning when she woke up in his bed.

 _Connie - I love watching you sleep._

That was all that he wrote but it said what he wanted to communicate, at least he thought it did. He returned his cell phone to the table and then moved to rest his head atop hers. She fit just so beneath his chin.

 _It was crazy how good they were together._

 **TO BE CONTINUED.**

 **I am not sure if anyone is reading this or not, but if you are, please let me know if you like it. Thanks.**


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